Wednesday, November 23, 2005



The Holiday Schedule and a turkey hangover that is still in effect delayed the write up for this week. But after the tryptophan had run its course and the blogging began, the result from a week earlier remained the same, an 18-6 beatdown for the Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Team in the NYDO (TM)) at O'Hanlon's.

There was a good sized crowd packed into the backroom at O'Hanlon's to enjoy the precedings. The 'Bag contingent was in full effect (all nine, plus Bag Lady Nell), O'Hanlon's had their crew. There were even guest appearances by idle Fockers, Neil and Craig, presumbably there to watch the Dartbags shock the world with an upset over the first place team.

Despite inspiration from Chuck Norris's feats of manliness and the distribution of motivational stickers obtained from a Chuck E. Cheese vending machine by El Capitan, it was not to be.

In a line up shake up, the 'Bags sent out the Captain to face off against Jamie Donovan. The big guy was on auto pilot and cruised to two wins 0-2.

Time for Round 2. It was a good one. Cup in his blue wool cap renewed acquaintance with Damien in his brown wool cap in what would become known as "The Battle of the Hats".

Tony: Loser has to take off his hat and have it pinned up behind the bar!

In the first game Cup threw a Ton-14, leaving him on 96. First dart, T-20, second dart, Single 18, third dart.... BANG! Double 9. A big 96 out for Cuppa and the 'Bags were on the board in fine style.

In the second match, Damien caught fire throwing 3 all star rounds and busting on 127 before taking the W.

Both men retained their hats. And their dignity. 1-3

RJ took on Tony in round 3. Historians say the Roman Empire fell in the 5th Century. Historians were wrong. The Roman Empire was back with a vengeance Tuesday at O'Hanlon's, Some of the sickest darts we've encoutered. Game 1: 95...Ton... Ton-80 and like that Tony was looking at a 126 out and a potential 12 Dart game. Make it a 16 Darter. 325 more ASPs in game 2 (700 for the two games) helped make it 2 more wins. As good darts as we've seen all year.

Veni, Vidi, Vici, (Ouchi) 1-5

CAPTAIN'S NOTE: There is one Dartbag who's name shall no longer appear on the website. (Should the forces of evil learn of his whereabout the results would be catastrophic). Therefore, it is now official Dartbag policy that his name cannot be revealed. So new nicknames are in order, something that captures his mysterious nature. Early favorites include "Deep Throat", "The Shadow", and "Lord Voldemort" (aka "He Who Shall Not Be Named"). But we can sort that out later. Now back to darts.

Deep Throat faced off against Juan in a pair of humdingers. In game one Deep Throat landed on 122. First dart, Trip 18...second dart, Trip 20, leaving 8 left... third dart -- single 8! A nearly spectacular out from the Nameless Wonder! He would hit a double 4 on his next dart to seal it. Juan would take game 2 to earn the split. 2-6

In the next set, Glenn "McDreamy" Pike in the unaccustomed role of the 5 slot, played Pat, who proudly adorned himself with a shiny sticker that said "Snow Princess". The Piker dropped the first match to Her Highness, but started looking a bit more like his old self in the second match and pulled out the split. It can now be said that IYH has notched victories in games against Jamie Donovan AND Pat Timmes this season. 3-7

Big Friendly Tim would take on Andre in the final set of singles matches. (His Latin name is actually Enormous Gregarious Timicus.) What can you say about Tim this season? It's been a breakout year. BFT registered 231 ASPs en route to a sweep that brought the tally 5-7. Great stuff.

And with half the points gone for the evening, the 'Bags were trailing the O'Hanlon's juggernaut 5-7. We were Half in the 'Bag in every sense of the word. That's pretty damn good! Especially if you consider they had us down 10-2 last time.

Then came cricket. The game we use to call "our game" was anything but. I will spare the gory details -- there may be children reading this -- but suffice it to say, we got shut out. And with that our 5-7 game became a 5-13 game.

In the last set, the 'Bags teamed Cuppa Joe with Lou (who had just arrived on the scene). They dropped a pair to Jamie and Pat.

Next Pike and Voldemort took on Damien and Andre. The 'Bags took the first - helped by Pike's 95-On, but dropped the second and earned a split, putting a momentary halt to the bleeding.

The last match featured the first ever pairing of Farticus and Colin. The crowd assembled at O'Hanlon's didn't give the underdog Dartbags much of a chance. In fact, the following exchange was overheard between Marty and a local tuff.

Local Tuff: You're in over your head, pal. Quit now before you embarass yourself.
Marty: Quit? I guess someone must've torn out the "Q" section in my dictionary... because I don't know the meaning of the word "quit".

And with steel in voice and a steely glint in his eye, Marty proceeded to double in right away... game on! Marty and Colin made a game of it in the first one and had a shot at a double 20 out before Tony stole the victory from them. They made a go of it in the second leg as well but fell short. Nonetheless, they exhibited the never say die/go down swinging/fight to the finish attitude that has made the Dartbags probably the most beloved dart team in all of North America.

And that was that. A tough loss. Especially after getting off to a promising start.But this is a team that recently smacked another A team 22-2. Also consider this: Yes we lost 18-6, but they had 5 guys who recorded more ASPs than our high man for the day (323). What does that mean? Well, it means a couple of things. One is that they are very, very good. Another is that we didn't play that well. In fact this was our lowest All Star total for the year. (Yes, ASPs do not equal good play, but there is a strong correlation -- just look at who's on the All Star Team).

So we played mediocre darts against the defending champs and managed to put ourselves in position to get a respectable result (needed a few more points to achieve that, I think) but we also drank well and had a lot of laughs. It was a fun evening despite the ass-whoopin. Next week we play at Biddy's. They will be better than they were the last time we played them. Trust me.

See you there.

All Star Recap:
Pike: 323
BFT: 225
Deep Throat: 218
Cup: 210
Cap: 100
Colin: 100 (Congrats to the Microwave, first ASPs in limited play this year)


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