SPECIAL WRITE UP: THE A PLAYOFFS AND THE WISDOM OF THE CUP

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 7 - 11 - 07

(NOTE: I apologize for the tardiness of the write up. I'm like you. I also like to go to blogs and see the latest posts. When they aren't up, it is irksome. So I'm with you. The first part contains a more generic write up. The summation at the end is courtesy of Cuppa Joe. His words, his picture. Back to darts...)

THE LEAD IN:

For four weeks they labored in frustration. They were drubbed in the first week 9-15. They produced a lacklustre effort in the second week. The third week, they were ignominiously thrashed in their home building 6-18. Who were these men? Certainly not the Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC -TM). We were struggling like Paris Hilton taking an SAT. We even tried to have an organized practice, but ended up wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend.

Nothing worked. It was a bummer.

But midway through week 4. Something happened at O'Flaherty's: We all got hangovers.

O'Flaherty's draught beers are famous for giving you hangovers, not the next day, but as you drink them. The effect of this strange brew was to change our chemistry. I mean that literally and figuratively. The fermented hops (w/ secret ingredient) altered the dopamine receptors inside our brains, inebriating us and inducing painful throbbing around the temples. But more than that, it changed the chemistry inside our team. As if a switch were flicked, we started to play better. And (not surprisingly) we began to have more fun.

We went on to win the night and we never looked back. We were undefeated the rest of the season. It took 28 days, but we were born again.

Amazingly, The Dartbags Spring 2007 incubation was exactly the average gestation period of our old friend, Ondatra Zibethicus. How's that for irony??

(CAPTAIN'S NOTE: It is, in fact, highly ironic. I know. I grew up on a river. I dealt with these furry and noble creatures on a regular and on-going basis. If you grew up on a river you would appreciate the irony and have a good chortle. Trust me. The muskrat analogy works. Works big time.)

With 5 weeks to go we got an additional infusion of chemistry (and firepower). Cuppa Joe returned from his island retreat in Florida to rejoin the squad. By the end of the year we were the best team in A-3. We could not overcome our fetal muskrat stage (few can, with the exception of the muskrat) and managed only a 3rd place finish. The hardware will have to wait. But we did accomplish a milestone - we made the A League playoffs.

Not bad for the little dart team originally known for having bar tabs that exceeded their All Star Points.

But we would face a major challenge. We would play Son of Leifer, the team we called "6 Grenades" because the depth of the team made it impossible to sacrifice a game (dive on a grenade) in hopes of preserving a better matchup. In fact, this was the same team that defeated us (gulp) 22-2 in our old building during our first season in A. It was a humbling experience.

Actually, no it wasn't.

We were already humble. What it was, was just plain embarrassing. But the squad had progressed. Things were gonna be different this time.

Cup was particularly fired up.

Cup: No more shines, Billy.

Craig: What?

Cup: I said no more shines, Billy. Maybe you didn't hear it, you've been away a long time...

Craig (pause): My name is Craig... what are you talk-

Cup: We don't shine shoes anymore!!!!

Craig: Okay, okay!... geez.

THE A LEAGUE PLAYOFFS:

SINGLES: 3-9

It was a great crowd at the Jeek. We had all our full contingent of players. Also on hand were retired Dartbags, Lou and Marty. Always great to see those guys. Many Dartbaguettes were there as well including Jessie, Nell -- there was even a rare Lillian sighting. It was going to be a fun night. And a lot of the reason why was the team we were playing, the aforementioned Son of Leifer, descendents of the house of Focker. This is a good bunch whom we remember from seasons past. In some ways guys on this team have been unofficial mentors to Dartbags (Craig and Julio come to mind), teaching us the game offering us encouragement going back to when were lowly (but ambitious) C League players. They were yukking it up so much pre-game that Frank jokingly admonished them, "Hey, guys... Cheer up".

Craig: Yeah, we haven't laughed like this for a while.

Mark: This used to be us every week.

The Playoffs: They make everyone a little giddy.

We started out by putting our best foot forward. Our best foot is named Glenn Pike. He faced Mark Patrick.

Folks, this was an A-1 match. Mark would put up an all star round (including a Ton-71), Pike would answer with a big round in return. Example: In game 1 after a hot streak by Mark opened a big lead, Glenn's raced down from 180 in two rounds and just missed a D-20 that would have stolen the first point of the evening. Not to be. Mark went out in 7 rounds, 8 rounds, 7 rounds - the last one a 20 darter - and maybe most importantly, he hit the Double first dart every time. Not much you can do but tip your cap. It was weird. We got swept, but it actually made us feel proud, because even though Mark was the better man, Glenn demonstrated that we belonged in this match and that we can compete with anybody. Great stuff from Glenn. Just ran into a British buzzsaw. 0-3 Son of Leifer.

With that mindset, Frank took on Ed Wilson in set 2. Frank got out of the gate at a gallop if not a sprint, hitting anything from 45 to 85+s and actually opened a decent lead. After Frank busted on a 78 (Note to Self: When on 78 throw 20 first THEN 18, not 18 first then 20 - there is no 2nd dart bust that way). It would be Eddie taking out D-8 to win the first match. But the Captain (fueled by his bottomless pit of rage) would recover with a respectable 26 darter to take out leg 2. The last leg provided some double out problems for both players, but Frank hit his XX first to take 2 out of 3. Fact is Ed didn't have his best game with him. (We've seen that game, it's nasty and it doesn't look like this). But if you're going to win, you're going to need breaks. We'll take it. 2-4. Son of Leifer.

Next it was Vince against Tom Kovach. Tom is capable of monster games (see his ridiculous 1722 ASPs to take the award for most points in a night this season). But Vince thrives on challenges and probably responds to getting smacked with more vigor than any other 'Bag. That's why he is The Hornet's Nest. It would be an interesting match. The darts, however, were less than stellar. Both players let the other stick around had each had a chance at game 1. But Tom hit it first. Vince was right with him in game 2, but it was not to be. In the final leg,"TKO" Kovach revved it up and was gone in 7 rounds. 2-7, Son of Leifer.

Cuppa Joe took on Julio Andrade in the final set. Julio is another player with a storied NYDO history. In fact he won the singles championship last year. But Cup has thrown many a dart with Julio down at The Edge. And Cup loves a challenge as much anyone. In the first game it was Cup "funneling" around the T-19, but maddeningly just missing the mark. (A cornucopia of T-3s). Julio took game 1. But Cup responded in game 2, taking out a 9 rounder with a D-4 to draw blood. Julio heated up in the final frame, however, smacking Ton-somethings. No stopping him this time. 3-9 Son of Leifer

CRICKET: 2-4

The 'Bags were hurting. So we decided to put our best foot forward again. (And Frank too.) Pike and Frank would take on old friends, Carlos Santiago and Craig Nobbs. In game 1, the Leifers fired out of the gate, five 20s from 'Los. Frank would respond with 2 19s. And that summed up the game. Son of Leifer just ran us off the board. Been a while since we gotten our butts kicked likt that. But in set two Pike would get it rolling with 5 19s and Frank closed the 20s. The 'Bags made good use of an open 19, tripping it when they needed points. The Good Guys of George Keeley, mainly on the back of Glenn (R-6, R-5, etc), pulled away and won the second game handily. The final set was a dog fight. The 'Bags raced out to a lead, but Carlos and Craig made a stand on bullseyes and just hammered them. Three at a time. Two at a time. Four at a time. Round after round of big darts saw the 'Bags lead evaporate. But it seemed like Pike had an answer each time, hitting a triple every round. (If there were a bright spot on the evening, it was that Glenn had regained his MVP form when we needed him most, and threw the riducudarts which had established him as an A-1 caliber shot.) It came down to a 2-2 bullseye contest and Frank finally hit a double to seal the game and take 2 out of 3. Whew! 5-10 Son of Leifer.

It was Vince and Cup taking on Julio and Mark, a very tall task. Julio and Mark are about as formidable a pairing as the NYDO produces. Vince and Cup were game. Solid darts (3 and 4 at a time) actually had pushed the 'Bags out to a lead in game 1. But the thing that becomes so clear when you play these top teams is that the margin for error is zero. It only took one missed closed, one missed triple to turn the game around. Julio and Mark would respond with a round of 6 (+/- 1) and before we knew it they had stolen a game. In the next 2 games it was more of the same. Julio and Mark dropping bombs. Vince and Cup battled and both had big rounds. Cup nailed 3 big bullseyes. Vince dropped an R-7. But the 'Bags couldn't land the deathblow and dropped the final two. 5-13

And that was that. The night was over after cricket.

FINAL: SON OF LIEFER: 13 - DARTBAGS: 5

So we got our first taste of A playoffs against a class A-1 opponent. We didn't play well. Which isn't to say we played terribly. But with the exception of Pike's hero darts, everyone else would rate their performance as average or worse. But, by the same token, Son of Leifer wasn't sharp. Cuppa Joe had a sage insight. He said that we could have easily be down 10-8 after cricket, but that they probably think they could have won 13-1.

Both opinions are correct.

That's why there are no woulda-coulda-shouldas in darts. There is no luck. You are what your record says you are. Tonight we were an A-3 team playing a class A-1 team. We need to play better if we want a big result. The good thing about playing the Leifers is that they're good company. You know when you play them you're going to have a challenge, a lot of laughs, a copious number of beers and an above average number of (manly) hugs. At the end of the night we all celebrated together toasting to both teams with a shot of Jamesons. Good stuff.

So we tip our collective cap to them and hope next time we give them a better fight.

So that was our season. All in all, a good one.

Every team member had a win % of at least 40% (that's never happened in A before).

Cup, Frank and Vince all set personal ASP highs.

Pike won 60% of his singles games... with a broken thumb.

Tim set a high out record.

Ginsberg actually won a set of singles.

Colin produced a winning record in cricket.

Next for the 'Bags is Steak Night, when we dine on the flesh of the world's tastiest mammals. It is the most venerable of Dartbag traditions (below is a list of the previous sites of steak night, with Frank's rating of each). This time we've decided to shake it up and go barbeque instead of pure steak. And, thanks to Farty's suggestion, we're doing it on 9/11 this year. (Our humble little way of saying f*ck you to the terrorists.)

Strip House - 5 Stars
Keen's - 4 Stars
Old Homestead - 3 Stars
Wolfgang's - ZERO Stars. Do NOT go to Wolfgang's. WORST SERVICE EVER.
Dylan Prime - 5 Stars
Del Frisco's - 4 Stars
Peter Luger - 5 Stars
Dinosaur BBQ - ? Stars

Congrats on the season, everyone. And thank you to those who came out to share in the fun and cheer for us. It wouldn't be the same without you.

See you in September. But I'm going to leave the final word to Cuppa Joe.

SUMMATION/ CUP-DATE (From Cuppa Joe):

At the end of the night, Jessie found a paper cup, sitting on the table of honor, alone, after all the smoke cleared, and everyone had left.

It was from starbucks, ironically, an empty cuppa joe.

Written on it are the following words:

"If I have given my all, and still do not win, I haven't lost. Others might remember winning or losing. I remember the journey."

- Apolo Anton Ohno, Five-time Olympic Medalist

And I guess, after all the darts have been thrown, this is why we did this in the first place.

(Well said, Guy.)