The Sweet Smell of Victory

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 5 - 12 - 08

Ladies Night at Marty O'Brien's; Drawn in by Darts, Drinks, Manly Smells

Final Score: Dartbags: 16 - Men Overboard: 8

The Scene: It was ladies night at Marty O'Brien's. They didn't come for the drink special ("2 for 1 Strawberry Alleycats & Blueberry Alleycats" - which is pretty hard to beat). It was just an unusually large gathering of Dartbaguettes, there to root on The Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC (TM)). Perhaps our largest and most festive gathering of the year. Certainly our best looking. Hopi, Nell, and Bridge were there. Lillian and her BFF from UCLA, Grace. And friend, and newest Dartbaguette, Shauna.

Missing were 'The Microwave' and 'The Hornet's Nest'. But Gins (God love him) was there as always. We even had an appearance by retired 'Bag, Big Friendly Tim.

The Darts: With just a few points separating 3 teams, the 'Bags are in a playoff race. In an effort to improve his team's chances, The Captain has never been afraid to think outside the box for Dart Night (TM). And he may have come up with his most brilliant/cockamamy idea/scheme... Enhanced Sensory Convergence (or ESC as the Dartbags call it.)

Try to stay with me on this.

We use all of our senses, and they must be harnessed to play optimal darts. We use our sense of sight of course (the visual sense), our sense of touch, by wearing shirts with freedom of motion and making sure darts are comfortable in our hands (the tactile sense) . We play good music (AC/DC, Flogging Molly, Skynyrd, U2, etc) -- to indulge the auditory sense. We overindulge our sense of taste, by eating Taco Taco, and drinking the finest beers (the gustatory sense).

But that only makes 4 senses. One vital cog, the "5th finger that makes the fist" is missing...

Our sense of smell. The olfactory sense. We have neglected this vital sense (one that is most linked to memory, by the way).

We've been running on 4 cylinders for too long. But I found a way to fix that.

By employing the use of this!

That's right!

There's something about an Aqua Velva man. Aqua Velva is now standard issue for the Dartbags, and will be made available upon request for the remainder or the spring season. With all 5 senses aligned in perfect harmony, the 'Bags were ready to rumble, with Men Overboard.

In the words of Navin Johnson: "Things are gonna start happening to us, now!"

SINGLES

Pike (2) vs. Mike Keady (1): Glenn fired out of the gate with a T-14 to start the night, and followed it with a T-33. He would cruise to the first win in 20 darts. In the second game, Mike was sitting under 60, when a jet-lagged Glenn summoned all of his Werewolf Powers, and juuuust missed taking out a supersweet 160 (last dart high). He would take it out on his 29th dart for win #2. Mike - who had been shooting very well - then took the final point in 8 rounds. Excellent singles games by both guys.

Frank (2) vs. Rufus "On Fire" Herrington (1): Big Rufus took the first point in a sluggish affair. Halfway through game 2, The Furious one lived up to his moniker by getting really p*ssed off, demanding his whiskey, shooting a T-20, followed by a two dart 76 out. In game 3, with Ruf on 18, Frank cleaned up the mess he had made, by butchering/saving a 16 out - 11, 1, D-2.

Cup (2) vs. Chris Chevins (1): Cup, who had specially designed and manufactured his own darts ("The Cuppa") could not find them. So he went back to his old familiar needles. (Whadda this guy? He throwin' needles now? He think, he thinks he's Johnny Needle Darts? No way. No WAY.) It makes you wonder why he ever left them in the first place. Except for a marathon XX war in the 2nd game won by the deserving Chris, (Whateva!) it was semi-vintage Cup. Two more points for the 'Bags...but his best darts would lie ahead.

Edna (1) vs. Tom Clarke (2): With Vince in Sin-City, the 'Bags called upon Former Ladies All-Star-Point Leader, Edna, to pick up the slack. Ed would drop the first to Tom, who went out in 8 turns in game 1. But Edna would draw blood in game 2, nailing a D-4 to record his first singles win (in extremely limited play) in league history. The third point would be a dog fight, with both players in it until the end. Tom would hit his double first.

CRICKET

GlennEdna (1) vs Rufus n' Mike (2): A strong effort by Pike and Ed won the first game, with Glenn throwing his patented In-Yer-Hole darts. Edna fired off a C-3 to climb back into the second game, but the effort fell short. Men Overboard would carry that moment forward and take the last point.

Cuppn'Cap'n (3) vs Chris and Tom: Lava is hot. Jessica Alba is hotter. And then there's Cup. He fired off 4-20s to start. And followed it with T-19, T-18, T-17 (ROUND 9). Frank tripped the 16. Cup closed the 15s. And two rounds later it was done. It was like an Allman Brother's record - Seven Turns. Absolutely filthy stuff from Cup, and likely the quickest cricket match in 'Bag history. Cup would cool off - sort of. He had a pair of R-6s in the next game. When he stuck a double cork winner it cap off the sweep, it was the best set of cricket we'd played all year. Possibly ever. Welcome back, Joey Pep.

DOUBLE '01

GlennEdna (2) vs Rufus and Mike (1): By this point in the night, after flying in from Italy, the effects of excessive air travel had gotten the best of him.

Glenn: I need to go home after this. I'm hallucinating.

Frank: Ok.

Glenn: No, seriously. I am.

Glenn got them on, and Edna, who just got better and better as the night went on, stepped it up a notch. He fired off 198 ASPs (Hopefully regaining his Ladies ASP lead) and nailing a pair of clutch outs....the last a D-4 to take the rubber match. Fine work by the promising dart rookie, who would later draw praise from dart veteran, Rufus at the end of the night.

Rufus: The little guy is good. He's got a good stroke. Bam! Bam! Bam! He'll kill you on the 20s.

(Thanks, Rufus.)

FrankenCup (3) vs. Chis and Tom (0): Getting on first helped in all three games. Cuppa kept up his hot shooting doubling out on the first two. There were a few hot streaks (3 consecutive tons) along the way. The last game of the night devolved into an unfortunate exercise in futility as neither team could stick the Double-1. Really awful. Frank finally caught it to end the night on a good note for the GK-7.

And that was that. A much needed 16-8 victory. A tip of the cap to Men Overboard. They were worthy opponents, and good sports.

Let's revisit the effect of Enhanced Sensory Convergence for one moment.

Ed: Chose not to use Aqua Velva, preferring his own signature scent - L'Edna: Pour Homme. (Cuppa did execute a successful "drive-by-velva-ing", however, sticking him with a small spot on his neck...which explains the c-3, and the T in doubles.)
Glenn: Would rock the Velva only for singles where he took 2/3.
Frank: Marinated in the AV, and went 8/9.
Cup: Applied fresh coats between each round, and went 8/9 with an R-9, and two R-6s.

Random chance, or the awesome power of ESC? You be the judge.

All Star Recap:

Cuppa: 736 (and a patch)

Pike: 464

Frank: 445

Edna: 198 (possibly regaining Ladies All Star Point lead)

We play at home vs. Three Penny Opera on Monday.

See you there.

That is all.

-Captain Furious

WRITE UP FOR WEEK # 14: FINALE AT FOLEY'S

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 01 - 07 - 08

It was a good crowd @ Foley's. All 7 'Bags were there as well as Baguettes, Nellie, Jess, and even Rachel (who accompanied The Microwave.)

The last time the 'Bags were played @ Foley's we got spanked 15 - 9. It was a debacle. The Good Guys of George Keeley were hoping to get a better result this time. It wouldn't be easy, Balls and Strikes would be hungry for points as they were locked in a dogfight for the final playoff spot. The 'Bags on the other hand, were sitting 5 points in front of the 3rd place team. First place was out of reach, but the 'Bags were intent on not letting their consolation prize slip out of their grasp.

Metrosexual Monday?

It was also a night of banal, but strangely engrossing conversation. Seven regular guys, having beers, hanging out in a premium sports bar with the Sugar Bowl on the tube. So, naturally the conversation drifted from football and whether Glenn Dorsey would be the first pick in the NFL draft... to fashion faux pas and hair care.

It started innocently enough. Frank wore one of his patented J Crew rollneck sweaters. The bar was hot, so Cup suggested that Frank take off the sweater.

Frank explained that, if he were to do so, he would in fact be shirtless.

Cup was flabbergasted.

Cup: You wore a sweater with no shirt underneath it!

Frank: It's really more of a shirt than a sweater.

But that wouldn't do. Cup refused let it go, and visibly struggled to come to grips with what he considered an egregious sartorial blunder.

Cup: You CANNOT wear a sweater with no shirt underneath! Look at you, you're sweater flops whenever you shoot, you're... you're Floppy Roll Neck Guy!

Glenn: Actually, the J Crew Roll Neck is really made to be worn with out a shirt underneath it.

Frank: I'm not Floppy Roll Neck Guy.

Cup: Yes, you are.

Frank: I'm not Floppy Roll Neck Guy.

Cup: Yes, you are... Floppy.

Frank: I'm not Fl- WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!?

But the conversation would sink even deeper into Queer EyeVille.

Cup: Look at Glenn's hair... it's perfect. How do you get your hair like? No. Seriously. It looks like it was sculpted out of clay.

Glenn: The key is not to wash it too often. Although I do use conditioner several times a week.

Frank chimed in, "I saw a werewolf drinking a Jameson's at Foley's Bar... and his hair was perfect. (Dep!)

Cup decided that Glenn was "The Werewolf" - at which point Glenn revealed that he liked this nickname much more than IYH.

So Glenn is now "The Werewolf". End of story.

But enough of fashion and and hair care. This blog is about darts.

Finale at Foley's

SINGLES: 9 - 3

Frank started out against Captain Steve, and began the evening with a Ton-40. Steve racked up 500+ ASPs and Frank compiled 441. But, neither man was sharp on the doubles. It was Frank winning the war of attrition, however, and starting the season finale with a sweep.

Up next, Piker would take on Jim "Mr." Coffey. Pike was a beast 4 AS rounds and a slew of 79+s. Jim nearly stole a game by taking out a 108. That was as close as he'd get. Back to back sweeps and the 'Bags were rolling.

Cup got his wish - to play Carlos, who took it to Cup big time in their first meeting. This time it was Cuppa coming back strong. Four AS rounds and two Ws to give the 'Bags an 8- 1 edge.

It was Vince drawing the heavy artillery in the form of Brendan Dowling. Last time we played BD, he took out an 18 darter and struck a Ton-80. This time he wasn't quite as a sharp (only had a 20 darter). But Vince withstood the onslaught and rallied to take the final point creating a 9-3 advantage heading to cricket.

CRICKET: 4 -2

Frank and Vince faced off against Brendan and Mr. Coffey. Frank and Vince were top of their game and coasted to victory in the first. Brendan and Jim would get revenge in the second set. But the 'Bags got an unexpected break - Frank's shaft snapped off and the stump got lodged in his barrel. Despite the efforts of Glenn and notable Dart Surgeon, Cuppa (who went to work with a steak knife and a cigarette lighter), the dart was done for the night. It worked out well when Frank's substitute dart (one of Glenn's 22 grams "goldies") wouldn't stop hitting triples. (Must have retained Glenn's mojo). The 'Bags took the rubber match with a slew of "golden" triples from Frank and a flurry of corks from Vince. 11-4

Pike and Cup went up against Captain Steve and Carlos. Again it was Glennjamin, en fuego. Cuppa Joe was also on top of his game. The 'Bags took the first and the last to earn two more points. 13-5

DOUBLES 01: 3 -3

Big Friendly Hero

Big Friendly Tim was not planning to come out tonight, but with only 4 appearances during the year, he needed this one to become playoff eligible. Being a "Team Guy" he agreed to scrap his restful evening and make the trek. The Hornet's Nest summed it up best.

Vince: You got called right off the couch... like Vinny Testaverde.

"Vinnie" and Glenn would go first in Double 01. The Vin-Man was his solid veteran self (lots of arm strength), hitting 57s like they Wayne Chrebet and getting us on the board in game 1. Glenn continued his white hot shooting delivering a 101-On and 5 All star (rounds including back to back T-33s in the last game). He racked up 1005 ASPS for the night (nice work, guy), but most importantly, he hit the doubles. Two more for the 'Bags.

Lastly, Cup and Vince agains battled Brendan & Jim, taking the first point. The Foley's crew, desperate for each W managed to pull out the final two points despite good efforts from the 'Bags.

FINAL SCORE: DARTBAGS - 16, BALLS 'N STRIKES 8

And that was that for the 2007 Fall Dartbags. We didn't take first, which was our main goal. (Congrats to Bullistics). But we managed to snag the 2nd prize. Less than ideal, but still, it's progress. We want to thank everyone who came out to hang with us and support us this year. It's one of the reasons we look forward to Monday Nights.

Feel free to do the same thing at Gaf East tonight for the first round of the playoffs.

Unfortunately, Captain Furious has to be out of town and will be unable to attend the match.

And he's pretty sick over it, to tell the truth. He was rooting for a snowstorm, but the Dart Gods wouldn't grant him one. So the 'Bags will have to take on "Never Shakey" Harlan Blaikie, Dax Munna and the rest of the Poison Dart Frogs.

Congrats, guys.

Give 'em hell.

And have fun.

That is all.

AS RECAP:

Pike: 1005
Frank: 441
Cup: 428
Vince: 340
"Vinnie" Sheahan: QB rating of 106.2, 237 yards, zero picks.

WRITE UP FOR WEEK #9: MOONLIGHT GINSBERG AND THE RETURN OF THE MICROWAVE

"Ginsberg Leaves Rangers For Dartbags, Ol' Rusty Makes Triumphant Return, Big Friendly Joins in Fun"

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 11 - 19 - 07

NOTE: This post was more substantial... but it got erased because the blogspot platform is as stable as Rosie O'Donnell going through Twinkie withdrawal. This version is shorter.
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The Dartbags had been inVinceable. But Vince was in California. Thus they were inVinceable no more.

Facing a resurgent Alleymen squad who seemed to have found their footing in A league, the 'Bags would need all hands on deck in order to pick up slack. They would muster 6 of 7 'Bags as well as a surprise visit from Lillian (who has been known to wander as far south as 33rd Street in pursuit of a delicious Auntie Anne's Pretzel Dog.) With no further ado this is what happened.

Glenn Pike 2, Ryan Shane 1

Frank Murtha 2, Tim Tully 1

Cuppa Joe Gasparino 1, Mark Collins 2

Mike Ginsberg 0, Gerard Leary 3

Pike was good not great. Ditto Frank who managed 4 all star rounds. Cup shot okay, but Collins was terrific. Still Cup managed to take a game off a good shot. And Gins... well, Gins was a hero no matter what he did. Ginsberg was actually watching his Rangers take on their arch-rival Islanders around the coner at Madison Square Garden. But, being the team guy that he is, he agreed to play singles because we had no other players available. The plan, suggested by the Captain, was to have Gins show up during the first intermission and then go back to catch the rest of the game. If timed correctly, he would miss no more than 5 minutes of hockey action.

But what Gins knew - and Frank did not - is that MSG has a no re-entry policy for Rangers games. In fact, the entire scene played out like one of our favorite movies.

Field of Dartbags

Gins: What have we got here?

Frank: We fell - 2 out of 3.

Gins: Why, this team's chokin' to death! You need to lighten up, just have some fun. You'll be all right. You'll be doin' handsprings again in no time.

He borrowed a set of the Captain's 22 Widows... and promptly got swept by Leary (who was shooting sick darts, literally not missing a 20 in one game until going for his outs). So be it.

Frank: Hey, Gins. Thanks for making it. It was a good effort. Go, enjoy the rest of the hockey game.

Gins just smiled and shook his head in answer... and the Captain came to a horrible realization

Frank: Oh, my God... You can't go back. You can't go back!

Gins: It's all right-

Frank: I'm sorry.

Gins: It's all right.

Frank: But you were only there for 1 period!!! The Rangers-Islanders is like your dream night. It would kill some men to get that close to their dream and not touch it... They'd consider it a tragedy.

Gins just shook his head.

Gins: Son, if I could only have been a Dartbag for 1 period... now THAT would have been a tragedy.

He shook each Dartbag's hand one after another and each one thanked him. No Gins didn't win a game. Frankly, we never expect him to. But the way Leary was shooting, he probably would have beaten any Dartbag. We call playing such hot shooters "diving on a grenade." And it was at that point we knew that Gins one appearance was like Moonlight Graham's one at bat... it was a sacrifice. Gins gave a little salute as he made his way out of Dart Alley.

Gins: Win one for me one day, will you, boys?

He turned to leave.

Glenn: Hey, Gins...

Gins turned 'round

Glenn: ... you didn't suck.

He gave a smile and twinkle returned to his eye. Ginsberg put on his Rangers cap, and then mysteriously disappeared into the crowd at the bar.

And then he came back 2 minutes later with a Jameson's.

Love the effort.

Darts took 2nd billing to drama in the 2nd set.

Sure, Cup and Frank took 2 of 3. But the real story was the valiant effort of Glenn and the season premier of Colin "The Microwave" O'Donnell.

Though each game was a dogfight, Glenn and Colin were on the verge of being swept. Though Glenn through big darts, the team of Leary and Shane was too strong. The 'Bags actually held a 4 - 2 lead on corks, but couldn't close the deal. The Alleymen caught up and now the 'Bags were trailing 1 cork to 2 with Leary waiting on deck. This location is very close to the town of "Sh*t's Creek".

Colin missed wide right with his first dart. Then he missed wide right on his second dart. The entire team was watching intently. You could hear a pin drop on Dart Alley. If Colin didn't hit a center cork with his last dart... we were surely dead. He stepped to the line. He eyed up the board. Drew back his hand.... and then he stopped. He turned and addressed the assembled throng:

Colin: Dire straits, indeed, dear chums. And no margin for error at that! Verily, this turn of events calls ... for Ol' Rusty.

Yes, THAT Ol' Rusty! The Billy Barool of the darting world. The enchanted arrow, never known to fail!

Colin reached into his brief case and produced a small wooden box. On the box were Celtic Runes in gold inlay - a language long forgotten. Colin pressed a button on the bottom and the box sprang open, revealing a misshapen bar dart laying on a velvet bed. He held it aloft.

Colin: Old friend, I would not have roused your from the arms of Orpheus, if we were not in grave peril. We have but one chance to hit 2 marks. Should we fail, we would most assuredly lose the day -- yon Leary has a lean and hungry look. So I say to you, once more into the breach, old friend! Cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war!!

And with a might, cross-handed swipe he let fly his volley! Ol' Rusty twisted swirled, drawn inexorably to the center bull. The blood red cork seemed almost to rise, like an expectant lover as Ol' Rusty penetrated deep into her fibers! An eruption of triumph was heard!

Dartbags: Hooray!

A miracle shot! The was much embracing (of a manly sort) and the slapping of hands could be heard!

Colin: Innkeeper, bring a round of your finest ales for all my friends!

Bartender: Huh?

Colin: Victory is ours!

At least... I think that's what happened. I know this. Colin was as cool as could be when he hit that game winning double cork. And we were as good as dead if he hadn't.

Afterward, Colin's reaction was reserved and utterly unflappable. In other words - typical.

Colin: I like the close matches best. They're more fun.

And THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is why he is The Microwave. Not only does he not feel pressure when he comes off the bench... he is literally unaware that he is even SUPPOSED to feel pressure. "I like the close matches best???"

Unreal.

And in the third set (and with considerably less drama) Big Friendly Tim got into the act by taking 2 games of Double '01.

We would finish the night with a 12-12 tie. But we would also finish the night with some serious highlights of the season. And every Dartbag got in on the fun. Winning, shminning. This was a fun night.

So the unbeaten streak stands at 20 weeks. And I'll end the recap right here because time is tight.

That is all.

SPECIAL WRITE UP: THE A PLAYOFFS AND THE WISDOM OF THE CUP

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 7 - 11 - 07

(NOTE: I apologize for the tardiness of the write up. I'm like you. I also like to go to blogs and see the latest posts. When they aren't up, it is irksome. So I'm with you. The first part contains a more generic write up. The summation at the end is courtesy of Cuppa Joe. His words, his picture. Back to darts...)

THE LEAD IN:

For four weeks they labored in frustration. They were drubbed in the first week 9-15. They produced a lacklustre effort in the second week. The third week, they were ignominiously thrashed in their home building 6-18. Who were these men? Certainly not the Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC -TM). We were struggling like Paris Hilton taking an SAT. We even tried to have an organized practice, but ended up wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend.

Nothing worked. It was a bummer.

But midway through week 4. Something happened at O'Flaherty's: We all got hangovers.

O'Flaherty's draught beers are famous for giving you hangovers, not the next day, but as you drink them. The effect of this strange brew was to change our chemistry. I mean that literally and figuratively. The fermented hops (w/ secret ingredient) altered the dopamine receptors inside our brains, inebriating us and inducing painful throbbing around the temples. But more than that, it changed the chemistry inside our team. As if a switch were flicked, we started to play better. And (not surprisingly) we began to have more fun.

We went on to win the night and we never looked back. We were undefeated the rest of the season. It took 28 days, but we were born again.

Amazingly, The Dartbags Spring 2007 incubation was exactly the average gestation period of our old friend, Ondatra Zibethicus. How's that for irony??

(CAPTAIN'S NOTE: It is, in fact, highly ironic. I know. I grew up on a river. I dealt with these furry and noble creatures on a regular and on-going basis. If you grew up on a river you would appreciate the irony and have a good chortle. Trust me. The muskrat analogy works. Works big time.)

With 5 weeks to go we got an additional infusion of chemistry (and firepower). Cuppa Joe returned from his island retreat in Florida to rejoin the squad. By the end of the year we were the best team in A-3. We could not overcome our fetal muskrat stage (few can, with the exception of the muskrat) and managed only a 3rd place finish. The hardware will have to wait. But we did accomplish a milestone - we made the A League playoffs.

Not bad for the little dart team originally known for having bar tabs that exceeded their All Star Points.

But we would face a major challenge. We would play Son of Leifer, the team we called "6 Grenades" because the depth of the team made it impossible to sacrifice a game (dive on a grenade) in hopes of preserving a better matchup. In fact, this was the same team that defeated us (gulp) 22-2 in our old building during our first season in A. It was a humbling experience.

Actually, no it wasn't.

We were already humble. What it was, was just plain embarrassing. But the squad had progressed. Things were gonna be different this time.

Cup was particularly fired up.

Cup: No more shines, Billy.

Craig: What?

Cup: I said no more shines, Billy. Maybe you didn't hear it, you've been away a long time...

Craig (pause): My name is Craig... what are you talk-

Cup: We don't shine shoes anymore!!!!

Craig: Okay, okay!... geez.

THE A LEAGUE PLAYOFFS:

SINGLES: 3-9

It was a great crowd at the Jeek. We had all our full contingent of players. Also on hand were retired Dartbags, Lou and Marty. Always great to see those guys. Many Dartbaguettes were there as well including Jessie, Nell -- there was even a rare Lillian sighting. It was going to be a fun night. And a lot of the reason why was the team we were playing, the aforementioned Son of Leifer, descendents of the house of Focker. This is a good bunch whom we remember from seasons past. In some ways guys on this team have been unofficial mentors to Dartbags (Craig and Julio come to mind), teaching us the game offering us encouragement going back to when were lowly (but ambitious) C League players. They were yukking it up so much pre-game that Frank jokingly admonished them, "Hey, guys... Cheer up".

Craig: Yeah, we haven't laughed like this for a while.

Mark: This used to be us every week.

The Playoffs: They make everyone a little giddy.

We started out by putting our best foot forward. Our best foot is named Glenn Pike. He faced Mark Patrick.

Folks, this was an A-1 match. Mark would put up an all star round (including a Ton-71), Pike would answer with a big round in return. Example: In game 1 after a hot streak by Mark opened a big lead, Glenn's raced down from 180 in two rounds and just missed a D-20 that would have stolen the first point of the evening. Not to be. Mark went out in 7 rounds, 8 rounds, 7 rounds - the last one a 20 darter - and maybe most importantly, he hit the Double first dart every time. Not much you can do but tip your cap. It was weird. We got swept, but it actually made us feel proud, because even though Mark was the better man, Glenn demonstrated that we belonged in this match and that we can compete with anybody. Great stuff from Glenn. Just ran into a British buzzsaw. 0-3 Son of Leifer.

With that mindset, Frank took on Ed Wilson in set 2. Frank got out of the gate at a gallop if not a sprint, hitting anything from 45 to 85+s and actually opened a decent lead. After Frank busted on a 78 (Note to Self: When on 78 throw 20 first THEN 18, not 18 first then 20 - there is no 2nd dart bust that way). It would be Eddie taking out D-8 to win the first match. But the Captain (fueled by his bottomless pit of rage) would recover with a respectable 26 darter to take out leg 2. The last leg provided some double out problems for both players, but Frank hit his XX first to take 2 out of 3. Fact is Ed didn't have his best game with him. (We've seen that game, it's nasty and it doesn't look like this). But if you're going to win, you're going to need breaks. We'll take it. 2-4. Son of Leifer.

Next it was Vince against Tom Kovach. Tom is capable of monster games (see his ridiculous 1722 ASPs to take the award for most points in a night this season). But Vince thrives on challenges and probably responds to getting smacked with more vigor than any other 'Bag. That's why he is The Hornet's Nest. It would be an interesting match. The darts, however, were less than stellar. Both players let the other stick around had each had a chance at game 1. But Tom hit it first. Vince was right with him in game 2, but it was not to be. In the final leg,"TKO" Kovach revved it up and was gone in 7 rounds. 2-7, Son of Leifer.

Cuppa Joe took on Julio Andrade in the final set. Julio is another player with a storied NYDO history. In fact he won the singles championship last year. But Cup has thrown many a dart with Julio down at The Edge. And Cup loves a challenge as much anyone. In the first game it was Cup "funneling" around the T-19, but maddeningly just missing the mark. (A cornucopia of T-3s). Julio took game 1. But Cup responded in game 2, taking out a 9 rounder with a D-4 to draw blood. Julio heated up in the final frame, however, smacking Ton-somethings. No stopping him this time. 3-9 Son of Leifer

CRICKET: 2-4

The 'Bags were hurting. So we decided to put our best foot forward again. (And Frank too.) Pike and Frank would take on old friends, Carlos Santiago and Craig Nobbs. In game 1, the Leifers fired out of the gate, five 20s from 'Los. Frank would respond with 2 19s. And that summed up the game. Son of Leifer just ran us off the board. Been a while since we gotten our butts kicked likt that. But in set two Pike would get it rolling with 5 19s and Frank closed the 20s. The 'Bags made good use of an open 19, tripping it when they needed points. The Good Guys of George Keeley, mainly on the back of Glenn (R-6, R-5, etc), pulled away and won the second game handily. The final set was a dog fight. The 'Bags raced out to a lead, but Carlos and Craig made a stand on bullseyes and just hammered them. Three at a time. Two at a time. Four at a time. Round after round of big darts saw the 'Bags lead evaporate. But it seemed like Pike had an answer each time, hitting a triple every round. (If there were a bright spot on the evening, it was that Glenn had regained his MVP form when we needed him most, and threw the riducudarts which had established him as an A-1 caliber shot.) It came down to a 2-2 bullseye contest and Frank finally hit a double to seal the game and take 2 out of 3. Whew! 5-10 Son of Leifer.

It was Vince and Cup taking on Julio and Mark, a very tall task. Julio and Mark are about as formidable a pairing as the NYDO produces. Vince and Cup were game. Solid darts (3 and 4 at a time) actually had pushed the 'Bags out to a lead in game 1. But the thing that becomes so clear when you play these top teams is that the margin for error is zero. It only took one missed closed, one missed triple to turn the game around. Julio and Mark would respond with a round of 6 (+/- 1) and before we knew it they had stolen a game. In the next 2 games it was more of the same. Julio and Mark dropping bombs. Vince and Cup battled and both had big rounds. Cup nailed 3 big bullseyes. Vince dropped an R-7. But the 'Bags couldn't land the deathblow and dropped the final two. 5-13

And that was that. The night was over after cricket.

FINAL: SON OF LIEFER: 13 - DARTBAGS: 5

So we got our first taste of A playoffs against a class A-1 opponent. We didn't play well. Which isn't to say we played terribly. But with the exception of Pike's hero darts, everyone else would rate their performance as average or worse. But, by the same token, Son of Leifer wasn't sharp. Cuppa Joe had a sage insight. He said that we could have easily be down 10-8 after cricket, but that they probably think they could have won 13-1.

Both opinions are correct.

That's why there are no woulda-coulda-shouldas in darts. There is no luck. You are what your record says you are. Tonight we were an A-3 team playing a class A-1 team. We need to play better if we want a big result. The good thing about playing the Leifers is that they're good company. You know when you play them you're going to have a challenge, a lot of laughs, a copious number of beers and an above average number of (manly) hugs. At the end of the night we all celebrated together toasting to both teams with a shot of Jamesons. Good stuff.

So we tip our collective cap to them and hope next time we give them a better fight.

So that was our season. All in all, a good one.

Every team member had a win % of at least 40% (that's never happened in A before).

Cup, Frank and Vince all set personal ASP highs.

Pike won 60% of his singles games... with a broken thumb.

Tim set a high out record.

Ginsberg actually won a set of singles.

Colin produced a winning record in cricket.

Next for the 'Bags is Steak Night, when we dine on the flesh of the world's tastiest mammals. It is the most venerable of Dartbag traditions (below is a list of the previous sites of steak night, with Frank's rating of each). This time we've decided to shake it up and go barbeque instead of pure steak. And, thanks to Farty's suggestion, we're doing it on 9/11 this year. (Our humble little way of saying f*ck you to the terrorists.)

Strip House - 5 Stars
Keen's - 4 Stars
Old Homestead - 3 Stars
Wolfgang's - ZERO Stars. Do NOT go to Wolfgang's. WORST SERVICE EVER.
Dylan Prime - 5 Stars
Del Frisco's - 4 Stars
Peter Luger - 5 Stars
Dinosaur BBQ - ? Stars

Congrats on the season, everyone. And thank you to those who came out to share in the fun and cheer for us. It wouldn't be the same without you.

See you in September. But I'm going to leave the final word to Cuppa Joe.

SUMMATION/ CUP-DATE (From Cuppa Joe):

At the end of the night, Jessie found a paper cup, sitting on the table of honor, alone, after all the smoke cleared, and everyone had left.

It was from starbucks, ironically, an empty cuppa joe.

Written on it are the following words:

"If I have given my all, and still do not win, I haven't lost. Others might remember winning or losing. I remember the journey."

- Apolo Anton Ohno, Five-time Olympic Medalist

And I guess, after all the darts have been thrown, this is why we did this in the first place.

(Well said, Guy.)