WRITE UP FOR WEEK #4: TEMPEST IN A TEAPOT

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE 10 - 23 - 06

(Note: I was away for the week, so write up is late and will be short.)

We played the "new" Tempest team at the Geke in a position to do some damage, but the darts came up short.

Frank was off his game and Vince was vinceable. But luckily Cup and Pike were on. The result was a tie score going into cricket.

Then, BFT, back from England for only a few hours teamed with Glenn to provide some scintillating cricket.

Pike: Maybe he really was at Dart Camp.

They swept.

On the back of that sweep, the Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC were leading 10-8 going into doubles.

But Frank'nTim came up short against Christian and Eric who wasted no time getting in and out.
They dropped all 3. But Cup and Vince took 2/3 to even the score.

So we tied, 12-12. George Brett famously once said that a tie was like "kissing your sister". In this case a tie was like kissing your unattractive sister... with halitosis... and a coldsore.... What can we say? It was not our finest hour. But still there were highlights from the likes of Glenn and Tim. And Cup and Vince taking the final 2 were nothing short of huge. Plus the Tempest guys were a good and friendly bunch.

Acknowledge... and move on.

Tonight we play down at Grassroots. It is our Halloween celebration. All players must be in costume. Let's rip it up.

All Star Recap:

Pike: 405
Vince: 352
Cup: 348
Frank: 200

WRITE UP FOR WEEK #3: EVIL TWINS

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 10 - 17 - 06

In some ways the Puffy's Crew have been The Dartbags' Evil Twin, like Evil Spock or Michael Knight's villainous brother, "Garth". We played on Tuesday, while they played in a parallel dart universe... Monday. While we were making a name for ourselves as the Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC (TM) on the Upper West Side, they were making their reputation on the Lower West Side. All the while our existences were eerie "mirrors" of each other, separated only by a matter of 24 hours and cheesy goatees. Both clubs started in C and sucked (hence their name, Collateral Damage... their nickname for splash points). While we were rebounding to crush C, they were doing the same thing one night earlier. We followed the C championship with an immediate B championship... they were doing the same thing one night earlier. Both made it to A where and are looking to climb the ladder. Today Collateral Damage was comfortably in first place... where we want to be.

What would happen if these two entitities occupied the same space at the same time? Would it create a wormhole in the time-space continuum? Would all of the molecules in our bodies explode at the speed of light? Would we drink a bunch of beers, throw a few darts and have some laughs?

The answers in order: "Yes" (we actually met Abe Lincoln!) "No, thank goodness", and "Yes again".)

If meeting your evil twin isn't surreal enough, we were joined at the bar by none other than Barry Sheck, whom you may remember as the most effective cross-examiner of OJ's all star legal team. We are pleased to announce that Barry Sheck is now the official legal counsel of the Dartbags.

We didn't have the full contingent. Marty was off "finding himself" at Disney World, and Big Friendly Tim was still in London, England at his week long, intensive dart seminar. They could not join their mates this evening. So the Dartbag crew worked in shifts to make up for their loss. First we were joined earlier in the evening by "Pew" Lou Henry, the retired Dartbag, who stopped in to throw a few. Later on, Hope and Colin made brief appearances before giving way to Nellie and Gemma who brought a bucket of birthday candy for Glenn.

Birthday boy, Glenn, led off for the 'Bags against Bryan Newman. Pike was solid, working his way down but ultimately landing on X (aka. Pikeville). But Glenn is the mayor of Pikeville and double 1s don't scare him. He promptly popped it for the victory. Unfortunately, Brian heated up and took the next two matches. 1-2

Frank faced off against Brian Kehoe (are all these guys named "Brian"?) in set two. Adding to the spooky "mirror" theme, they began the match by mirroring each other scores... 43, 81, 43. Brian took the first game. Frank rebounded to take game two after narrowly missing a 109 out. In the final game Frank kicked it into gear and appeared ready to cruise to victory, but the double eluded him he ended up on D-1. He would drop a disappointing rubber match. 2-4

Cuppa Joe faced off against Kurt Klein who shot the lights out. KK wracked up ASPs and took 7 and 8 turns to get out. Tough stuff. Score it 3 points for the bad guys, 2-7.

But this meant Vince would be angry. We like that. Vince roared out of the gate and proceeded to throw relentless, consistent darts. He took game 1 in easy fashion. In game 2, he missed taking out 115 by a smidgeon, but sunk the out on his next turn. And game 3 was closer, but yielded the same result, another huge Dartbag victory.

It would be difficult to understate the extent of the hugeness of that sweep. It took our position from something horrible to a managable 5-7 score and changed the entire outlook for the evening.

Vince and Glennjamin started out in cricket against Newman and Rob. (NOTE: Could not find score sheet so details are sketchy). The Good Guys were able to take one game, and appeared on their way to win a second. But hot shooting by the Puffy People (a triple by Newman closed the 20 late in the game and removed our ability to point) and we let them off the hook. The bad guys took game 3 to make it a 1-2 set.

Frank kept the team alive in the first game until Cup finally anounced his presence with authority (R-6). The 'Bags recognized that being up a bull or two is not enough against a team like this and proceeded to point the crap out of them (i.e., 5 bullseys). (To make sure they didn't get their nose out of joing, Frank commented to Brian after the game that it was pure respect. They were cool). In the third game, Cup's hot shooting carried the day with Frank chipping for a few points along the way. It was a classic ham and egg with each teammate picking up the other. 2/3 over Kehoe and Klein and it was now 8-10 heading into Doubles.

Vince and Frank led off. The good guys dropped the first. In the second game the 'Bags led most of the way. The opposing player made it interestin by hittin a 118 to land them on X, Frank ended the suspense with a D-15 on the first dart to notch a point. In the third game Newman went on in 120 and the 'Bags never got into it. 9-12.

We could tie the game with a sweep in the final set. But in the first two games Glenn and Cup couldn't get on the board. The Puffy Boys on the other hand got in quickly. The result was insurmountable leads and easy victories for the home team. The third game started out similarly, the Dartbags sleepily down by 200 points early. But then, something happened. That Ol' Dartbag Magic started to kick in. Cup announced his birthday present for Glenn would be an all star round. True to his word, he hit a 95.

Cup: Happy Birthday

Glenn followed that with a 99 of his own leaving 74 left and pulling us back into the game. On the next turn, Cup followed Glenn's advice. Go for the triple 14 to leave 32. He just missed it and caught an 11. With 63 Pike again served up some advice.

Glenn: Go for the Double Bull out.

Cup nodded and hit a fat 13 as instructed. His next dart would likely be his last. Hit it and we win. Miss it, and Collateral Damage likely goes out on 40. He steadied himself, took aim and -- DOUBLE CORKED IT, eliciting a simultaneous "YEAH!" from all the Dartbags that turned the heads of everyone in the bar. There was much high-fiving, (manly) hugs, and handshakes all around. Uberclutch dart. It gave us an extra point to pull us to double digits (10-14) and provided the highlight of the season. Niiiice, guy. What a great note to close out the evening.

The 'Bags made like old times and hung around to watch the Chicago Bears storm back and steal a game from the Arizona Cardinals. Vince and Cup threw a bunch of games and Frank and Glenn caught up at the bar. Like most discussions between a couple of guys at a bar the talk eventually turned to health and beauty tips. We all know that Pike has a thick head of hair that calls to mind a young Sam Malone. What I didn't know is that he is also a font of knowledge on proper hair management. The conversation was fun and informative and has led to what we hope will become a regular blog feature...

Hair Care Tips from Glenn

"Here's a little pick-me-up that's a great way to restore body to limp, unmanagable hair. After you've shampooed, instead of reaching straight for the conditioner, try rinsing with a bottle of beer. Nothing too heavy, a nice pilsener does the trick. Work through, and rinse with lukewarm (not hot) water. You'll find that one beer-cycle is enough to deliver that 'fresh from the salon look' every time." -- Glenn.

Thanks, guy. We'll check that out some time.

Cheers to our Evil Twins, Collateral Damage. Losing always sucks, but there are some teams you just hate losing to. This wasn't one of them. They were good company all night long and even bought us a shot of Jameson's to close the evening. And thanks to all who stopped by and Nellie for bring a bucket of candy. We wanted better than a 10-14 loss and, frankly, we should have had it. But this team has been putting a whooping on everybody so far. We were reminded once again that we have the ability to more than hang with anyone in this subdivision.

Next week we play the Tempest Imperials at the GeKe. This appears to be a different bunch than the Tempest team last year. Which is too bad. Because we owe those guys a beatdown. Nonetheless, we'll hope to get back on track against the new Tempest and make a move towards first place. Hope to see you then.

ASP Recap:

Cpt. Furious: 459
Cuppa: 310
Vince: 295
Pike: 297

WRITE UP FOR WEEK #2: BACK TO EARTH

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 10 - 8 - 06

--------BACK IN BLACK!---------













"FRISCO", RALLY BONE #2

After three straight weeks of playing with themselves, the Dartbags (Drinkin'est and Friendliest Team in NYC TM) returned home to the friendly confines for a real life league match. Armed with a bigger, blacker version of the Rally Bone, they would face off against an entirely new entity, Three Pronged Approach. Though they missed Marty and Tim and the usual throng of Dartbaguettes, they were joined by surprise guests, Tom "The White Hawk" Lally, and Neil McLoughlin. Tom was kind enough to keep track of the ASPs and Neil volunteered to keep track of the "Points per Dart" -- a first in Dartbag History, which are included in the write up below.

Would the long layoff hurt the effort? Or would the Good Guys of George Keeley make like week #1 and score some big points? Here's a hint... bet the under.

Glenn faced off against Tarek, the opposing Capt. in game 1: MY DARK HAT, Tarek got out of the gate fast! He never let up and was gone in 24 darts. Game 2 was closer with Glenn sitting on 4, but Tarek hit his double first. MARK THE DAY, he finished in 30. Leg 3 revealed a much more focused and Glennjamin who salvaged the final point with a 31 darter leaving Tarek on 16. 516 ASPs for the Uberbag. 1-3.

In set two, Capt. Furious did battle with Dartbag Nemesis, Floyd Rivera (a.k.a. "Uncle Tony").
Frank hit a T-80 on his final warmup throw so naturally started the game off with ... a 21. Ugh. Uncle Tony hit 3 Tons on his way to a 21 Dart blowout. The Capt nearly stole the second match, but Uncle Tony hit his D-2 to close it out (31). Truly some sick darts by the Keith Hernandez look alike who had 794 ASPS at the end of the round. Fortunately Frank woke up for the last one and on the back of a slew of 60s, closed out 19-18-D16 en route to a 24 dart victory. Tommy Mcquaid would be proud. 2-4

Joey Pep took on Dax in set 3. The first was a sloppy affair that Dax took in 41 darts. The second match was a little crisper, but Dax took it out in 33. In leg 3, Cup started to pepper the 19s and took the finale in 31 darts. And once again, the Dartbags took 2 games to warm up, played well in the 3rd and walked away 1-2 for the set. 3-6

Vince faced off against Paul Wang in the final set. It was Paul in the first one (32 darts). The Wanger kicked it into gear in the second frame andtook out an impressive 22 darter. But The Hornet's Nest started buzzing in the final set and Vincenzo was gone in 26 darts, leaving Paul sitting on 83. 4-8

Once again the 'Bags dropped the first two in the set, but found their form to take the final leg. The good news is that by the 3rd game, in every match, the Dartbag was the better player. The bad news was, if we don't find a way to heat it up quicker (maybe we should consult The Microwave, Colin O'Donnell... this seems to be his specialty), we're going to find ourselves on the wrong end of a lot of singles scores.

It was Glenn and Frank against Paul and Uncle Tony in cricket. In the first set... Uncle Tony ripped it up. Throwing R5s and an R7. The 'Bags made it close, but fell short. In game 2, some Dartbags showed their form, finding the triples and cruised to a blow out victory. But in game 3 the power of Uncle Tony's moustache was too much... the bad guys rolled to a walkaway victory. Ouch. 5-10

Vince and Cup took on Takashi and Scott in the second set of Cricket. The 'Bags were --

Bzzzzz.... Wait a minute... Did you hear that?

Oh well. Where was I? Oh yeah, the 'Bags were about to--

Bzzzzzz... Shhh! There it is again...

Bzzzz... It sounds like-

BZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Yep.... someone stirred up the Hornet's Nest.

The story of the cricket was the story of angry Vince. The closest thing I can compare it to is in Fast Times at Ridgemont High when Jefferson pounded the crap out of the Lincoln High football team because he thought they trashed his Camaro. A few examples? The other team has 20s closed and 16s close. We have one 16 and zero 20s. Vince sticks a trip 16 with his first dart, then pops a TRIPLE 20 for the close. Example 2: They are poised to point us on 15s. We have none. Vince misses with dart 1, then hits a single, with zero hesitation be buries the last dart in the double for the close. Just great stuff in all 3 games. And with Cuppa Joe always ready with bullseyes upon request, the 'Bags took an impressive 2 of 3 to made cricket respectable 7-11.

On to Double '01 where The Hornet's nest and Glenn played Floyd and Tarek. Vince fired a T-21 and a T-40 and added his name to the high on list with a sweet T-36 double start. Glenn was solid as well and they went to take 2 of 3 from Uncle Tony and Tarek. No small feat. 9-12

Frank'nCup faced off against Takashi and Dax. With a chance to tie the match with a sweep, the pair fell short. Takashi went in on 108 and the 3-Prongers never looked back. Dax chipped in 3 tons along the way and their superior play led to a sweep. Bad note to close on.

So the final was 9-15. Not the way we drew it up. With the exception of Vince, everyone's play was a little disappointing. The other team played well and were a good bunch of guys. Gotta tip our collective cap to them. It will not be easier next game. We face Collateral Damage (@Puffy's Tavern), who are in first place and have to be considered at this juncture the best team in the sub-division. We'll need a better effort, if we want a better result.

A small turnout for a dartnight, but it was a pleasure having Neil and Tom on hand to help out with the scoring and the drinking. Both more than pulled their weight. Perhaps my favorite moment was when Tom met Colin. I remember it went something like...

Cup: Hey Tom, this is Colin. Colin, this is Tom. He owns The Gaf.

Colin: Ah, a publican! Well met, sir!

Tom: Are you the one they call, "The Microwave".

Colin: The same!

I'm pretty sure that's how it went.

All Star Recap:

Vince: 597
Frank: 520
Glenn: 516
Cup: 216

Bring Back Open Mic!

Open Mic night at Keeley's used to be our secret weapon. Whether it was "little rapper guy", a bizarre vaudeville revue or just some comically earnest schmuck trying way to hard to sound like this guy in an effort to impress his drunk girlfriend, we could always count on Open Mic Night to confound the "away" team once 10 o'clock rolled around.

This was critical a factor in our success because we were also much drunker than the away team once 10 o'clock rolled around.

Of course there were good acts. Steve Owen's classic guitar was fantastic. And Chicken Stand Throwdown Band flat out rocked. (Coolest live version of Rocky Top ever).

But the best reason to bring back Open Mic would be so we could hear our own, Dartbaguette, Nell Teare. Check out the first of many of her original music here.

Trust me... that would reeeeeally distract the other team.