Thursday, May 25, 2006

WRITE UP FOR WEEK # 10: REDEMPTION AT THE LITTLE TABLE

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 5 -- 22 -- 06

(NOTE: My apologies for the tardy write up. I've been on the road and then I lost the damn score sheet which is why there's not as much detail. If not for Cuppa Joe, there probably wouldn't even be a write up. This week's will be more prompt.)

After two straight weeks of beatdowns, the Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC TM) were looking for more than points, they were looking for redemption. Facing off against the first place McCarthy's team would give them a chance for just that. Thankfully the Carly Simon CD had been removed from the jukebox -- whoever did that, thank you -- so a repeat of the Carly Simon incident of '05 would be avoided. And with Roger putting an hour's worth of quality classic rock tunes we were in good shape. As Cup put it, "best selection yet".

The 'Bags were shorthanded early in the evening, but a late arrival by BFT and cameo from Colin helped get us to 6/7. Farty was ultimately unable to attend. In addition, there were no 'Baguettes present for the first hour.

Tony: Where are the ladies??... I read the blog.

But Nellie, Hope, and Gemma would eventually make the scene along with Ginsberg, making for a much more festive atmosphere.

Actually, it was an interesting environment at McCarthy's with two A league teams present on the boards. Normally it doesn't rate a mention, but this was a different case. On the front board was a match up of the two best teams in the city and darts being played at a truly professional level. A 12 dart '01 match? Are you kidding me??? 18 darts and under every time. Crazy stuff.

It reminded me of those big family Thanksgiving dinners. You know the ones where there's one big table where all the adults sit. And then there's that little round table in the corner for the kids.

That was us. We were at the kid's table with our sippy cups, plastic forks and turkey pieces pre-cut into manageable bites.

But that doesn't mean there wasn't some fine darts being thrown. Pike led off against Terrence. This was our heavyweight match. In the first game, Terrence started out strong, but Glenn hung in there. With Terrence poised to go out and Glenn down to 71, Glenn went first dart, T-13, second dart, D-16. Bang! A lightning strike to take the first one. Way to steal it. In the second match, Terrence was, apparently, angry. He started off with a with a T-40 and sitting on 95 took it out T-19, D-19. Great darts. In the final match, Pike was back in form and won a second nailbiter with a first dart out to create a 2-1 advantage.

The Captain's darts were shakey. Maybe he just never got comfortable. Or maybe he was distracted by the repeated shouts of "Ton-80, Tony Roman!" coming from the other board. (Told you there was sick darts being thrown over there). Left, right, high... Frank hit everything except what he aimed at and he paid the price against Mike. Two winnable matches. (Mike went out on 101 in game 2 for a blitzkreig victory). Zero wins. Just awful. The only blip of the night, but a costly one. 2-4.

Then we went from the bad, to the just plain spooky. Cuppa Joe was having a promising warm up to that point. He had already hit a C-6 and a C-5. But when Hubert, was taking his warmups he would do this bizarre hand wave at the board after each turn. It was hard to describe. Sort of like a Jedi Knight doing a mind trick. Or a witch doctor placing a hex. Then as they began to play, the strains of CCR's "I Put a Spell On You" came over the jukebox. (Like I said, spooky). Between voodoo music and Huboyt's hand hex, Cup's mojo left the building.

Cup (to Hubert): You put a spell on me.

Actually, it was more he put a curse on the entire board. Fact is, neither one of these guys could get it going. Paris Hilton could have finished a Rubik's Cube faster than these guys finished the first match. But Cup, perhaps inspired by Neil Young's "Heart of Gold" on the jukebox would get it together. He shook off the curse, regained his mojo and threw solid darts in the final 2 walking away with 2 of 3. 4-5.

Vince played former 'Bag nemesis, Jason. Vince -- who threw big darts -- all night. Taking the first, getting run in the second and sticking the third to once again earn a 2/3 split. Vince's efforts pulled us even and it was 6-6, headed to cricket.

Glenn and Frank faced off against Terrence and Jason in cricket. They dropped the first one in an uneventful match. In the second match the 'Bags staged a major comeback. 5 16s by Pike were followed by two double corks by Frank to take a late lead, but Jason shut the door by scoring 32 pts to go up in points and nailing a bull on his final dart. That one hurt. There were good darts thrown by everyone, but apparently the most entertaining aspect of the match was Frank's (unbeknownst to him) habit of bending down to sip his Jameson's on the table in between throws so that he resembled a Dippy Bird. The 'Bags finally took a point when Frank hit 4 15's to close the number and put us up a bull. Jason closed the 15s. And Pike ended all hopes of a comeback by hitting 3 corks for the win. Terrence, who had been crushing the bullseye, was clearly was disappointed that he didn't get a turn to crush us on bulls.

Terrence: One chance! You won't give me just one chance??

No, dude. That was the whole point. 7-8

Vince and Cuppa Joe took on Mike and Hubart. Once again, cricket would prove a challenge. Despite some hero darts from Vince -- including a clutch 15 -Bull -Bull finish to win a nailbiter -- the 'Bags again dropped 2/3. Effing cricket, man. And like that, we went from even to down 8-10.

So we headed into doubles with an outside shot at a W, but it would take big darts. Pike and Angry Vince started us out. They faced off against Terrence and Mike -- a very tough combo. Terrence took out a 104 in game 1. But the good guys responded with an evener in game 2. The McCarthy-ites took the final in a heartbreaker and the score was now 9-12.

It was during this match that Vince supplied the Line/Call of the Night (TM). With the Yankees down 9-1 to the Red Sox in the bottom of the 9th with 2 outs, Alex Rodriguez stepped to the plate. Having seen this many times before, Vince offered a prediction.

Vince (to Gins): Twenty bucks A-Rod hits a meaningless homerun here.

And, true to form, A-Rod hit the next pitch 400 feet for a homer. Great call. And it drew a lot of cheers and amusement from Tony, Vince, Gins and the others watching the ball game. We even got a new slang term out of it. From now on (though we never give up) meaningless, unclutch, stat-padding darts in games where we are being blown out will be referred to as "A-Rod Darts" or "A-Rods" such as "I am leading the league in A-Rod points (APRs)". Alternatively, A-Rod may be used as a verb as in "They were up 10 bulls, but I A-Rodded the 15s to make it look respectable." or "He was on 32, and I was on 461, but I A-Rodded a Ton to keep my points streak alive".

Note: My apologies if it was Gins who said this to Vince and not vice versa.

Anyway, back to Frank and Cup against Hubert and Victor. In the first game, Cup's late heroics (a double 20 that had avoided Frank) snatched a win from the other team. In game 2, Frank opened with a 108 on to keep the 'Bags weekly high on streak alive. Joe once again provided the dramatics with unA-Rod like clutch hits. Sitting on 34 in a close match, he hit a 2. His next dart just missed the mark and landed in the D-8, he followed that up with a second D-8... and a fruity looking "double hop of joy" that had Nell cracking up. What the hell was that??? He looked like my girlfriend's pet rabbit, Cadbury.

(Let it be known that Frank, who has reduced his "gay spins" by 85% this year, is no longer the owner of the fruitiest physical reaction to a dart turn.)

Still, you can bunny hop all you want. Hell, guy, you can do the effing Macarena, as long as you hit the clutch outs. We needed 'em big time.

So we finished at 11-13 against the first place club. Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda. Sure, we missed some opportunities along the way and it would have been nice to get a "win". But we had also gotten humiliated 7-17 the previous two weeks and we were playing the top team in the league on their turf.

We'll take it.

Sorry again for the lateness (and reduced quality) of the write up. It got away from me this time. And thanks to all the friendly folks for hanging out at McCarthy's, "The Happiest Place on Earth". It was a good time.

Next week we host Carlos "The Jackal" Santiago and MYOB at George Keeley. See you there.

Capt. Furious

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

WRITE UP FOR WEEK #9: GRIN AND "BEAR" IT

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 5 - 15 - 06.

Back in the cozy confines of GK, the Dartbags were ready to take on their friendly rivals, Where's Cork? (a whimsical double entendre that simultaneously alludes to playing darts drunk as well as the county in southern Ireland.) Actually, it was a bit of a tenser mood than usual. Frustration from last week (when we got whipped downtown by the 1997 NYDO All Star Team) seemed to carry over. With a bitter taste in our mouths, the 'Bags were looking to score some points of our own.

It was a relatively small turnout for the evening. Absent was our stalwart, Vincenzo, along with the legendary Colin "The Microwave" O'Donnell. On top of that, Marty "Farticus" Yoo would have to leave early. (Perhaps that was for the best... he was spared the carnage of the third period). 'Baguettes (as usual) made the scene, Hope and Nellie to make us look goooood.

Here's what happened:

Glenn squared off against Kevin in the first set. It was a close match, but when Kevin missed his chance for an out, Glenn didn't let it slip away. Sitting on 71... first dart T-13, 2nd dart D-16. Bang! 1-0. This seemed to fire up Kevin who opened the second game with a T-40. He followed that with a frustrating turn of 3 triple 1s. This also seemed to fire him up because in his next turn he moved the target over an inch and put 3 darts in the triple 20 for a T-80. The lesson would appear to be, "don't fire up Kevin." He would go on to take the game. But Glenn would rebound and another solid effort gave him the tie breaker. 2-1 'Bags.

Capt. Furious followed against Tom. A choppy affair finally ended when Frank hit a D-10 out. Tom avenged the loss after Frank couldn't hit D-9. He stuck a T-35 to land on 40 closed it out soon after. (Note: This pattern of play would would later lead to his being dubbed The White Hawk -- Leucopternis Albicollis to you ornithologists out there -- I.e., He circles around... circles around... gets down under 200 and then -- SWOOP! -- two rounds later, he's gone. Frank would again struggle to hit the double 9 but finally managed at 9, 1, D-4 out to take the tie breaker. 4-2 D'Bags.

This unfortunately was as good as it would get on the evening.

Cup then faced off against, Harlan. Cup wasn't on his game, but I'm not sure it would've matter that much. Harlan served up a pu-pu platter of all star scores 97, 123, 136, 123... (what ever happened to a plain old Ton?). The third contest was close, with Cup rounding into shape, but Harlan broke out his patented "Achy Blaikie Dart" (good one, Cup) and stuck a D-16 to complete the sweep. Tip the cap. Move on. 4-5.

Big Friendly Tim would face off against professional 'Bag killer, Brian. Neither man was especially sharp, but Brian had enough to pull out game 1. At this point, Frank went to the jukebox to punch up some tunes. First song, "Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand. An excellent choice for '01. Tim responded on cue and won the second match. However, the song playing during the tie breaker would also prove to be prescient -- "I Can't Stand Losing" by The Police. (A terrible choice.) Brian heated up in the third, and we dropped the rubber match. 5-7 at the end of singles.

FrankenTim would start off cricket against Kevin and Brian. In the first game the home boys blew a lead and lost a 19s vs. 15s war. No excuse for that. In the second game, 2 bulls would've won. Couldn't get it done. In the last game, we just got housed. Some valiant darts along the way. But not good enough. Sweep for the bad guys. 5-10.

Up next was Glenn and Cuppa Joe vs. Never Shakey Harlan Blaikie and Capt. Jason. The format calls for a game of cricket. But it didn't feel like we were watching a game of cricket. It felt more like (to borrow a George Carlin line) "like watching flies f*ck". Utter tedium. And the games took for-EVer.

Glenn didn't seem to have his usual swagger, So Tim and Marty pulled him aside to give him a pep talk :

Tim: You know what you are? You're like a big bear with claws and with fangs-

Marty: .-- big f*cking teeth, man.

Tim: Yeah... big f*ckin' teeth on ya'... you know, you got these claws and you're staring at these claws and your thinking to yourself, and with these claws you're thinking, "How am I supposed to kill this bunny, how am I supposed to kill this bunny?"

Marty: --And you're poking at it, you're poking at it...

Tim: : Yeah, you're not hurting it, you're just kinda gently batting the bunny around, you know what I mean? ... And you got these f*cking claws and these fangs, man! And you're looking at your claws and you're looking at your fangs. And you're thinking to yourself, you don't know what to do, man. "I don't know how to kill the bunny." With *this* you don't know how to kill the bunny, do you know what I mean?

Marty: You're like a big bear, man.

It seemed to help a little. But not really.

At times it seemed like Glenn and Cup were actually a 4 man team. Themselves, plus their alter egos Slippy and Norwood with whom they would tag team in and out of the match at random intervals.

Norwood: Whiff
Slippy: One drop, one mark, one miss
Norwood: Wide right, wide right, wide right TAG!
Glenn: Five 19s TAG!
Cup: Two bullseyes TAG!
Slippy: Another whiff

And despite it all, the Dartbags nearly swept the round! Let's face it -- The Gaffers weren't playing well either. If not for a comical 5 minute stretch at the end of game 3 in which Slippy, Norwood, (as well as the Gaffers) absolutely refused to hit the winning cork, the Dartbags would taken all 3.

So, what the heck?, we'll take the points. 7-11 going to doubles.

I sort of wish I could stop writing here. But posterity compels my hand. Seatbelts, please. And shoo any young children away from the monitor.... this is gonna get ugly.

Frank and Tim went up against Kevin and Brian. Same result. If you don't hit your outs right away against guys like that, you simply can't expect to win. 3 more down the tubes.

Glenn and Cup went up against Tom and Harlan in the final set. The first was close. Then -- SWOOP! --The White Hawk hit a T-32 to leave Harlan a nice out. He cashed it in. In game two, Cup opened with a crazy T-35 on. (A high on is now a weekly occurrence for Cup.). But the Gaffers hung with them. It got down to about 180 a piece when -- SWOOP! -- Tom hit a T-35 to leave Harlan an out. They would again cash it in. Pike followed Cuppa's lead in the final game of the night and smacked a High on of his own (101). But... aw hell. You know the story. They got down and got out first. Another sweep and a pair of frustrated Dartbags.

Perhaps too frustrated? It was Paul-O'Neill-circa-1996 -like. If there were a water cooler present, I'm sure someone would have overturned it. It's too bad our passion couldn't be channeled into better darts. We all expect better from ourselves.

In fact, that Swingers analogy pretty much sums up the evening.... Them ... Us.

We're still a little too "Mikey". We have fangs and claws (witness Pike's 71 out, Cup's high on, all the R-7s from cricket.) But we just don't seem to know how to use them sometimes. We still have the killer instinct. But less thinking/wallowing and a little more confidence would go a long way toward letting it surface. We're facing another bunch of predators on Monday, the first place McCarthy's team. And we're facing off in their den. Sharpen your claws, gentlemen. We'll need 'em.

Line of the Night (TM). Cup after having a dart pop out in Double 01

Cup (to Tom): That was an embarrassing bounce out.... got any Viagara?

Tom: Hey, at least it shot.

Cup: Yeah... but the board wasn't satisfied.

That's restaurant quality innuendo, folks.

All Star Recap:

Cap: 580
Cup: 539
Pike: 416
BFT: 288

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Returning the Shout Out

Some dart bloggers (and friends of the Dartbags -F.O.D.s) were kind enough to link to our site.

We appreciate that and wanted to return the favor to ....

Jen at the thedirtytrees.blogspot.com and Harlan at blaikie.blogspot.com

We can see about getting the links in the link section but I'm currently unable (not the website operator). In the meantime, we invite you follow their exploits as they navigate their ways through the NYDO seas. Good stuff.

I am going to go out on a limb and say the NYDO has more team websites/blogs than any league in the country. Full of Ship and The Dartside were the first two teams (in that order) as far as I know who established websites for their teams. We started with weekly email recaps to teammates and supporters. But after seeing what was out there, Cup came up with the idea for a blog and took the initiative.

Setting one up is pretty easy and there are plenty of good reasons to do it. We do it as a way to keep people informed, create an unofficial team record, and to squeeze a few more laughs out of Dart Night. But mainly... we do it for "the kids".

It's all about the kids.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Mr. George Keeley

Ladies and gentlemen...Mr. George Keeley.
















Yes, the real life legend, pictured here with Cpt. Furious,
aka, Frank Murtha. Maybe the luck of this Irish icon will
get us back on track.

The rally-bone seems to be losing it's luster.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

WRITE UP FOR WEEK #8: I'LL MAKE THIS BRIEF

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 5 - 08 - 06

This will be a brief recap. You don't need 800 words to describe dog feces.

It is what it is. And it stinks.

Perhaps Frank's cutting himself on a sharpened edge of the Rallybone on his way to Tempest should have been recognized for what it was -- a message from the Dart Gods that they we were in for a rough night.

Not even a pregame trip to Walter's or Cuppa Joe's delicious Jamaican Jerk chicken wings could invigorate the 'Bags. Nothing worked.

The 'Bags picked Monday to throw their worst darts of the season and paid the price against a new and improved Tempest gang. 5-7 after singles in which they had to switch the score keeper because his hand cramped up from writing down all the Tons. It was 6-12 after cricket. 7-17 is your final. Yes, they really did shoot that well. And, yes, we were that crappy.

As disgusted as we were, it didn't affect our sense of humor. Last night provided the best comedy of the year. Many good lines. Whether it was Marty's joining a discussion on rock climbing certification and explaining that he received his certification via the Internet.

Marty: I'm an "e-climber". I climbed Mt. E-verest.

Or when "We Built This City" by Starship came on (quite possibly the worst song EVER, they literally blast that song at hostage takers to get them to give up) and Tim cracked up the table by recalling the the "Mm Bop" incident of '04.

Tim: What the...? Did Colin get control of the jukebox again?

Or Frank's attempt at humor with the bartender.

Bartender: What can I get you?

Frank: Got any hemlock?


Bartender stares blankly for 3 seconds

Frank: Jameson rocks, please.

Or After glenn and Cup had the double-in-blues shooting at double top.

Frank: "Hey Cup....why don't you go down this time?"

Leading to Line of the Night (TM)

Cup: "Eff that! ...I'm not goin' down 'til later."

Next dart... double 20. Niiiiice.

What's that old expression? You have to laugh to keep from crying? Oh well. All you can do is push the reset button and try to do better next week. Feels like I've been saying that a lot lately. Probably because it's true.

So we'll file down the Rallybone, practice a bit, and rip it up again on Monday at Keeley's. Next week's opponent? Where's Cork? Always a good time.

Thanks to those who made it out and made it an enjoyable night overall (e.g., Nellie, Hannah, Jessie, Gemma).

That is all.
--------------------
All Star Recap:

THEM: Eleventy-hundred.

US: Like, freakin 2.

Monday, May 08, 2006

DOUBLES CHAMPIONSHIP RECAP: A STOUT EFFORT

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE:

The Dartbags would sent their two most intense members (Angry Vince and Captain Furious) to represent the Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest Dart Team in NYC (TM) in the Doubles Championship. The venue? Stout. A cool place with a good dart set up downstairs in a sort of industrial setting. A "Dart Factory" as Jenny (of the Dirty Trees) put it. As Tom Petty sang, "The waiting is hardest part." And it would be a long wait. With a first round bye, it took nearly 2 hours to get on the board. But with dart action, baseball on the tube, good friends around and cold frosties on the bar... it wasn't a bad way to spend a Sunday. What follows is a round by round recap.

SET 1: Dartbags vs. Tinker Baa Bees.

They sqaured off against Brendan and Mark from the A-3 team Tinker Baa Bees in a best of 3 set. The D'Bags got off to a slow start but had their chances. (Early afternoon jitters?) After missing their outs, the Tinkers were up to the task. And like that, The 'Bags were down 0-1 and had their backs to the wall. Losing in this spot would have been disappointing, embarassing as well as just plain annoying -- there would be a 5 hour wait to play again if we went down. It was not an option. The Bags would have to step it up. A lackluster beginning put the good guys down in points with one number closed to their 2. Thats when it happened. Vince smacked 7 huge 17s to turn the game around. Frank closed. Vince tripped 16 to create some separation. Frank tripped the 15s and stuck a double bull. And Vince removed the suspense by sticking a double on the next round. An impressive victory and we were knotted at 1-1. It was back to 01 to determine the winner. Both teams were in first round and Mark followed his in with a T-117. The good guys were flagging. It was at that point when Lillian arrived, and like the fabled "Lady in White" who stood up to shake Roy Hobbs from his slump in The Natural, the effect was immediate. The Capt. popped T-21 and followed with a T-30 to leave Vince on 52. But the 'Bags somehow turned a 32 out into a 4 out. The last dart eluded us. With the other team caught up and ready to take 20. It was Vince who on his 3rd dart nailed a double 2 for the W. Clutch! And the 'Bags advanced.

QUARTER FINALS: Dartbags vs. Blue Thunder

Once again the 'Bags found themselves against wiley veterans, this time B Leaguers from the Blue Room. As a B team playing an A team it meant that the 'Bags had to win 3 games before they won 2. So what happened? A subpar game 1 led to a loss. And, once again, we had put our backs to the wall. This time we needed 3 in a row. (WTF???) But up next was cricket. Vince popped 4 20s. Frank hit 4 19s. And they just rolled from there. It was a mauling. Then came double 01. Another convincing victory. The other team won the bullshot but made a fatal mistake... they decided to go first rather than pick the game. The 'Bags chose cricket. The good guys rolled to an easy W and with that, they were in the semis...

SEMI FINALS: Dartbags vs. Colliningus

With a birth in the finals on the line, the 'Bags took on the Collins C squad. C squads can be dangerous in this tournament. (Other big dogs had already been knocked out by them). It just takes a couple of good shooters, plus they need only 2 games to an A team's 4. But the 'Bags took control early and didn't let go. Jameson makes the details hazy, but it seemed like everytime they had a big turn, we answered back. The result was a 4-0 sweep.

FINALS: Dartbags vs. Totally Toasted

Who'd've thunk it? After an unceremonious dumping last season, the 'Bags probably would have been happy just to throw some good darts this time around. Instead, we found ourselves in a position to take the Championship. But we were facing our toughest task of the day...

A deep roar was heard in the distance... the echo rumbled through out the cavernous underground of Stout. A shreik went up from the other darters and they scrambled for shelter. The sound of approaching footsteps shook the very ground on which the Dartbags stood..... BOOM.... BOOM..... BOOM. An ominous orange glow appeared in the hallway, growing brighter by the moment.... BOOM... BOOM... BOOM...

Vince: What is this new devilry??

Frank: A
balrog... a demon from the ancient world. This foe is beyond any of you... RUN!

Okay. That didn't really happen. Instead we faced our old friend Omer and John Wood ("Woody") of the A-1 Totally Toasted. But, let me tell you... they're no picnic either!!

It was best of 7, with 01 up first. Woody wasted no time in smacking the 20s. A couple of Tons by him created a lead. The 'Bags never got in it. Smackdown. 0-1. Next up was Cricket. (THIS JUST IN: A-1 players play cricket considerably better than B/C players.) We hung in, but dropped it. Damn. 0-2. Back to 01. We had our chances... we didn't cash in. Damn again. And now it was 0-3. But the 'Bags still had pride. And Vince wasn't about to let the 'Bags get embarrassed. After Woody hit 2 20s to start, Vince missed 1, then hit 1, and with his last dart stuck a triple. Huge dart. It would set the tone. Frank remembered how to play darts and chipped in 4 19s of his own. The 'Bags would advance to victory. 1-3. Back to 01. Details sketchy. But the 'Bags were up to the task with Frank getting us on, and Vince getting us out. 2-3 and we weren't dead yet.... except that we were. Some restaurant quality cricket by Omer and Woody, a few bad turns by the 'Bags and that was that. Congrats to Woody and Omer on the Championship. Well-earned. We'd have to settle for 2nd place.

So we'll take it. We'd have liked a better showing in the final, but we have no complaints. We got some hardware. Thanks to Lil for making the scene and rooting us on.

That is all.

Capt. Furious

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

WRITE UP # 7: RETURN OF THE A-2 TEAM

CAPTAIN'S LOG: DART DATE: 5 - 1 - 06

(Note: For full effect all Links should be Right Clicked and Opened in New Window. Otherwise you lose continuity.)

"Three years ago, a crack Dartbag unit was sentenced to C Division by an NYDO court for a crime they DID commit -- sucking at darts. These men promptly escaped from that division. Today, still wanted by the authorities, they survive as soldiers of fortune, drinking beer and throwing darts on a weekly basis in the New York darting underground. If you have a (drinking) problem, and no one else can help -- and if you can find them (hint) -- maybe you can play The A-2 Team."

Yes, the Dartbags (Most Drinkin'est and Friendliest dart team in NYC TM) have come along way, from the mean streets of C to the jungles of B to to the battlefields of A, from Tuesday to Monday. And they've had a lot of adventures and good laughs along the way. Monday night at the Collins Bar they encountered an entirely new foe. A gang of local toughs from Hell's Kitchen who called themselves "The Taint". They'd established quite a protection racket, pushing the locals around for far too long... enter, the A-2 Team.

It was a bit of a different feel at Collins. For much of the night there were only 4 players -- a light showing by 'Bag standards. Tim was on a mission elsewhere and Colin was AWOL. Farty made the scene but couldn't get there until late. (Why do they call him Farty? click . Damn straight.) Hope had a rare miss, but the late arrivals of Nell and Gemma ensured there were Dartbaguettes present. Even Chris "Dishpan" Giudice a "season 5" addition to the A-2 Team's crew made the trip down from Keeley's to hang with his old friends.

We were playing a team we had never seen before and were badly in need of points. We decided to put on our best Face and lead off with Glenn. Pike shot well but a math error led to a bad leave in game 1. He could not recover in time against James O who (much like the obsessed Col. Decker) would prove a relentless thorn in an our side. Pike's darts were good, James's better. 0-3 start.

The Captain faced off against Mark in an attempt to get the mission back on course. El Cap came out gunning with 2 Tons to start. He held on for a W and we were on the board. He lost his way in game two and dropped a close one before sinking a double 2 in the rubber match to walk away with a second win. 2-4

Up next was Vince against Jeremy. Jeremy came out firing T, T-40, T. Three rounds into the game and the guy was already on an out. But vince showed grace under pressure. Combat experience and years on the run had sharpened his survival instincts. He kept his cool and counted down steadly helped by a Ton of his own. When Jeremy faltered, Vince pounced, stealing game 1. In game two, 'Cenzo struck like lightning. Sitting on 176 he popped a T-40. His next dart stuck in double 18 winner, leading Cup to comment. Game 3 was a nailbiter, but Vince was clutch. Score it a sweep and a lead in the process 5-4, Good Guys. Asked about his performance afterward, Vince was fired up.

Cuppa Joe went up against Rob in the final frame. Rob was sharp. Cup's aim was a little off. He dropped the first two and was poised to drop the 3rd frame. But Cuppa kept it together, sitting on X with opponent on 16, the bad guy looked confident. But Cup would have none of it. And with that, he stuck his second dart in the Double-1 and salvaged the last point. Afterwards he was still fuming at himself. He received some words of encouragement from the Capt. but was in no mood to hear it. (I hear ya, we've all been there). Tied at 6-6 heading into cricket.

A dejected Cuppa Joe sat in a booth with his legs up and a grim expression on his face. A friendly female patron of the bar noticed his high quality footwear, leading to The Line of the Night (TM).

Friendly Girl: Nice Shoes!

Cup: I wish my game was as good as my shoes.

Friendly Girl looks confused and slightly hurt. Walks away.



Vince and Pike expressed concern over their intense teammate. But we knew Cup be back.

On to cricket. Cricket has been our bane this year. Our lowest percentage game and where we generally lose our matches. The team discussed strategy. Frank asked Glenn if we wanted to go first and play with him in an effort to shuffle the line up a bit. Always a thoughtful player, Glenn paused before consenting.

Glenn and Frank proceed to roll. Pike was vintage. Frank was solid. The first two games were walkaway wins, thanks largely to consistent triples from Glenn. The final game got close by the end, but a double bull on dart #3 sealed the deal for the 'Bags. The strategy worked to perfection leading the Captain to comment. 9-6

Vince and Cup dropped the first vs. James and Mark in rapid fashion. But this only seemed to fire up the 'Bags. Cup's determination was stronger than ever, and he vowed revenge. No more jibber-jabber! Cup returned to form and Vince was nasty as ever. In the second game, the bad guys needed just 2 bulls to close the cork. We needed a bull for points and two 17s. Cup wasn't sure how to play it, and Vince told him to"zip up" the 17s before throwing at cork. Cup was defiant and was insisted on following his own instincts. Cup threw first dart - double cork, second dart 17, second dart 17. Huge finish that left the bad guys stunned! They secured the final point to put us up 11-7. And for the first time in a long time, we the Dartbags A-2 team was rolling.

Glenn and Frank teamed up again in double 01. Glenn was on his game once again. Good thing too, because Frank was bad to the point of being subversive. Example? Pike puts Frank on 170. (beautiful). Frank respond with a whopping turn of ... 3. Leaving 167.

Frank: At least I left you an out.

Glenn was unimpressed. But despite Frank's best efforts, Glenn stubbornly insisted on winning. With the other team poised to go out on 32, he took out a 10 with a 5, 1, Double -2 game winner. Clutch stuff. The good guys dropped the next one. In the final game it was Frank's turn to provide a pick me up. A couple of Tons and a D-12 game winner pulled out the W. And the score was now 13-8.

Cup and Vince squared off against Mark and James (who is quickly becoming a nemesis). Doubling in troubles proved a handicap and the bad guys stormed to victory in the first. In the second, Cup got the good guys on the board with a big T0n-35 on and the 'Bags were in business. But big darts from the Collins guys overcame the difference. In the last match, it was Vince's turn to represent, and he went on with a 96. But it ended in a loss as well. Big finishes > big starts. Oh well. Final score 13-11.

Bad start and a bad finish. The middle part was excllent (13-5) so that's something to build on. (Is that a reach? Possibly. It reminds me of Mitch Hedberg's comment about his high school rock band, "People either loved us or they hated us. Or they thought we were okay.") Regardless, the fact is they shot some great darts and we took 13 points off 'em. It's been a while since we've returned to the "win" column. So what the hell. We'll take it.

Tune in next week for the continuing adventures of the Dartbags -- the A-2 Team. The next episode is Monday night, same time, different place (The Tempest Bar on 8th Ave.) This time the role of the "Bad Guys" will be played by Tavern Revisited. We defeated them handily in the original meeting. You can expect a bigger challenge in the sequel. We'll see you then and in the immortal words of Col. John "Hannibal" Smith... CLICK